There’s a lot of things you learn about yourself when you move halfway across the world. Many of these lessons are predictable and cliché, such as realizing you’re capable of more than you ever imagined, or that taking risks and enduring discomfort can lead to personal growth. Or perhaps you come to terms with the fact that it doesn’t matter what side of the road you drive on, you’re just a bad driver (cue Austin’s knowing smirk).

One thing I didn’t expect, however, was realizing how much I would miss the cold weather around the holidays. Some of you are probably thinking, “Well duh! Snow and Christmas go together, Heather. Of course, you were going to miss that during your first holiday abroad.” But with all honesty, I had been hyping myself up for Christmas at the beach. While I fully expected to feel heavy over the lack of time with family, I naively assumed we’d distract ourselves with the novelty of a warm and sunny holiday break. But as I started to spot Christmas decorations pop-up across town, including Santa on a surf-board, I found a bit disorienting that the holidays were nearing. It felt like less December and more like Christmas in July.

But rather than let the intrusive thoughts of “Bah Humbug” escape, I silenced my inner Ebenezer Scrouge threw myself into my newly self-nominated role of “Christmas Cheer Creator.” Throughout December you could find me baking our favorite holiday cookies and treats, decorating the house in red and green tinsel and holly, playing Holiday jazz during dinner time, planning Christmas-themed crafts (most of which were a bust), and dragging the family to every holiday-themed community event I could find. Whatever it took, I was going to make this first holiday the best it could be.

One event we kept hearing about over and over was the Franklin Road Christmas Lights in Ponsonby, an older neighborhood in Auckland central. Every year the residents of Franklin Road voluntarily decorate their homes in colorful lights and Christmas décor to the delight of the Auckland community. For the month of December, families and friends walk up and down Franklin Road, laughing, taking pictures and occasionally even caroling. After multiple nights of begging Austin and Larsen to make the trek into the city, they finally agreed to go the night before Christmas Eve. Though a few homes in our neighborhood had tinsel hanging outside their home or a light-up candy cane in the window, Christmas lights were noticeably missing from the homes around us, so I was truly excited to finally see some twinkling lights.

As we walked along the very crowded street, our eagerness for the evening slowly waned with each house we passed by. Despite the palpable joy and excitement from the people around us, we couldn’t help but feel a bit underwhelmed by this notorious annual event. While a handful of homes went above and beyond with lights and themed décor, the majority of homes were minimally decorated or lazily ornamented. I was confused as I watched the people around me taking photos of houses, awed by the decorations that I found quite boring. How could they be so impressed by this rather basic display of lights?

My mind instantly brought me back to the memories of driving around Sioux Falls (both as a kid and an adult), visiting the infamous themed-neighborhoods of Fireplace Lane, Penguin Lane and Candy Cane Lane. Comparing my childhood memories to the sights in front of me, I remember thinking “Man, this is nothing. They have no idea what REAL Christmas lights are!” It didn’t help that it was nearly 9:00pm and the sun still hadn’t quite set, so the aesthetic of the lights was a bit lacking. But it was more than that…the “essence” of Christmas just wasn’t there for us.

Over the past handful of weeks, Austin and I had both experienced conversations with co-workers, parents or even store clerks who knew or sensed we were American. They would ask us whether this was our first Kiwi Christmas, followed by questions like “Is it cold where you come from?” and “Did you get snow at Christmas?” Nearly everyone envied us for getting to grow up experiencing a true white Christmas, “like in the movies.” And it until that night, on Franklin Road, that it truly hit me how deeply grateful I was for the perfect type of Christmas I’d grown up with in the past. I really did take it for granted back then, and only now did I realize how lucky I was.

Cozying up under blankets to watch Christmas movies isn’t quite the same when the weather is warm and the sun is still shining at 8pm. There’s nothing like a dark home lit only by the soft glow of the Christmas tree, the sound of whistling winter wind hitting the windows, creating swirls of snow on the sidewalk outside. Turning on the oven to bake cookies in the kitchen is far less enticing when the summer sun is beating through the windows, warming up the house and begging you to go outside instead.

Though we did our best to make Christmas Eve and Christmas Day festive and fun, embracing a mix of Kiwi and American traditions, we missed our family immensely and struggled to stay in the holiday spirit. We spent our days watching movies, Face-Timing loved ones, and cooking nostalgic recipes that made us feel a little closer to home. On Christmas Eve we honored Kiwi cuisine and had ourselves a “sausage sizzle,” grilling a variety of sausages from the local butcher shop and enjoying a deliciously cheesy baked mac and cheese. On Christmas Day, I tackled the traditional Kiwi-classic dessert, Pavlova, while Austin and Larsen made Grandma Sharon’s infamous Norwegian Meatballs. Christmas afternoon the sun came out after a few days of rain, so we escaped the house to visit Milford Beach, where we laid out across the warm sand and took a dip in the still quite cold ocean water (it’s finally starting to get warm enough to stop turning out lips blue!)

Unlike in the US, when a lot of the country heads back to work after Christmas, Kiwis are notorious for taking weeks or even months off during this time of year. With the kids out of school until February and the weather hitting its peak perfection, it’s common for Kiwis to head to their bach (or holiday home), go camping or take a trip to visit one of the many beaches NZ has to offer. While we didn’t travel anywhere special during Austin’s two weeks off of work, we enjoyed the extra time we had as a family by trying out new recipes, exploring new places, and simply just enjoying each other’s company. We’re grateful for the time we got together, but by the end of those two weeks, we were ready for a bit of normalcy and routine again.

With Austin now back at work and Larsen spending the rest of her summer break attending a variety of summer camps, including a tennis camp and local art camp, I’ve continued my search for a job. Before Christmas, I had a promising call with a healthcare company I’ve been eager to join. I’m awaiting a call when their offices open back up and feeling hopeful that this just might be my big break (fingers crossed!) I’ve also been focused on improving my overall physical health after spending much of December seeing a Chiropractor and Acupuncturist for some severe hip pain. I’ve long suffered from back and shoulder pain, due to extreme stress and anxiety from the past few years. But in early December, after getting back into a routine of walking and working out, I started to experience extreme pain at night that left me literally screaming in anguish. It became increasingly common for me to wake up in the middle of the night, unable to move my body or get out of bed, anxiously trying to catch my breath from the intense sharp pains that would flash through my hip and lower back.

After a few visits to the local Chiropractor, where an X-ray revealed I have mild scoliosis and a tilted pelvis, I began working with a personal trainer to better understand how to strengthen the muscles needed to support my back. Slowly but surely my body has loosened up and I’m beginning to feel less pain and more strength in my body again. At the age of 36, I will never take advantage of good health again. The crippling pain I experienced for the past month really brought things into perspective for me. I am far too young to be unable to do the things I want to do, like go on a walks without feeling pain or play outside with my daughter without triggering back spasms. So over dinner one night, I shared with the family that my goal for 2026 is a stronger, healthier me.

Austin’s resolution is also to be more active, specifically playing more tennis. He’s been missing his time on the court and is eager to create space in his day to get back into playing. Larsen, ever the ambitious goal-setter, selected three resolutions for the year. First, she wants to improve her handwriting. Second, she wants to get better at drawing. And third, she wants to read more books. I’ll keep you updated on how the three of us fair on our respective goals.

For our family, 2026 brings the opportunity for a fresh start. After months of feeling unsettled, anxious and disoriented, this past month has given us the stability we’ve craved. Specifically, this past weekend together was a big milestone for us. For the first time in a long time, it felt normal and almost “like we were back at home” (Austin’s words). Multiple times over the past few days I looked to Austin and said “This is what we’ve been waiting for. I’m just so happy. I’m having such a wonderful weekend.” While at a local park event, Larsen ran into a friend whom she played with for hours while Austin and I sat on a picnic blanket enjoying live music. Leaving our local hardware store, we unexpectedly ran into one of our new friends with his daughter. And just this morning, when I dropped Larsen off at tennis camp, I walked in and ran into a familiar face from my local Chiropractor’s office. Though small, these little moments have grounded us, making us feel more and more connected and at home in our new country.

To our family and friends at home, still navigating the cold winter and the heaviness of the national news, know that we are thinking of you and sending our love. We acknowledge that not everyone can change their circumstances in the way that we have, and escaping the challenges back home isn’t an option for so many families. But just as you all did for us in our times of hardship, we’re here to support you – even from an ocean away. And remember, we are capable of more than we think we can handle, any current discomfort will (hopefully) lead to personal growth or change, and you’re all likely much better drivers than me (even on those snowy, slipper Midwest roads!)